Considering that 90s era cheese factor is all the rage when wielded ironically (as it is for the season four trailer of Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt), Taylor Swift doesn’t seem to understand this concept quite fully and has chosen to include a blooper reel on the screens of venues throughout the land at the end of her Reputation Tour, which is set to kick off in Glendale, Arizona on May 8th.
As the date approaches, Swift has been practically goading her fans with kernels of information about details of the tour. Hence, in another unironic turn, appearing in a Bob Dylan t-shirt to tell people, “Hey guys, it’s four days away from the tour starting, and today’s fact is that I wanted to tell you after the show ends and people are filing out going to there cars, there’s going to be a bloopers reel that plays.” From what the “sneak peek” entails, Swift doesn’t allow her image to be too sullied with embarrassment, and there is certainly no slapstick to be seen. Much to Lucille Ball’s dismay. Instead, there are just bad jokes, like “You’re just gonna need to leave little pieces of candy to get me to go to the right place.” Bitch please, leave that shit to visual execution by the witch in Hansel and Gretel, who would rather lure innocent children because at least they’re not phony baloney. Another clip finds her “hamming it up” by dancing “goofily” in between her choreography.
In her controlled manner, Swift is persisting in “exposing herself” and “unraveling the layers to her frailty,” a career move she set the precedent for with the video and song for the blame-shifting “Look What You Made Me Do.” And while any harm to her reputation done by the Kardashian-West alliance is essentially nullified at this point now that people have been forced to reconsider the source, Swift has already gone too far down the path of this strategy of “being relatable” to turn back now. Not that she hadn’t vaguely and falsely tried to establish it with the country-tinged “You Belong With Me,” prattling on about, in essence, how she could never compete with the other girl, when she, in fact, is the very embodiment of Wet Dream Barbie. In any case, the blooper reel is all part of this carefully crafted though seemingly nonchalant plan. Yet, once again, Swift will never fully reveal what’s behind the veneer, if there is anything at all other than a cold, calculated pop song writing genius. If that’s true, it’s not a big deal. Just don’t try to mask it with a string of contrived “accidents” posing as a blooper reel.
