The precedent for women declaring themselves as feminists yet still going ahead and working with known sexual predators was most glaringly set in recent years by Lady Gaga in 2013 with her extremely uncomfortably titled “Do What U Want” featuring R. Kelly. Yes. R. KELLY. Long well-known for being a despicable piece of shit (who certain white boys like to egregiously compare to Dante for the “brilliance” showcased in “Trapped in the Closet”). In spite of this public knowledge, Lady G came to her senses a bit too late as she tried to whitewash the track by creating a new version of it with Christina Aguilera.
In Lana Del Rey’s case, working with BØRNS occurred before the latest revelation of the #MeToo movement in music. And sure, it probably “seemed like a good idea at the time,” what with her sister, Chuck Grant (the only person she’s more obsessed with than, once upon a time, the man responsible for inspiring all the songs on Born to Die), taking so many photos of him and then directing his music video, “I Don’t Want U Back” (the line he presumably gave to most of the girls manipulated into sex)–which Del Rey herself promoted on her Instagram. Collaborating on two primo tracks, “God Save Our Young Blood” and “Blue Madonna” on the album of the same name (released at the beginning of this year), Del Rey was blithely unaware that, just months later, the floodgates on tales of woe and abuse regarding BØRNS would be opened.
Del Rey, recently touting an image of herself with Chuck and Marina Diamandis as the trio sipped cups that read “feminist” messages (in the vein of Kim Kardashian feminism of course)–her own spelling out “Feminist as Fuck”–is thus put in an indirectly uncomfortable position, and accordingly still has yet to comment on any of the allegations (then again, it did take her a minute to renounce Harvey Weinstein by refusing to ever sing “Cola” live again). While some would say it’s neither necessary nor her place to say anything about the confirmed pattern of inappropriate behavior BØRNS has exhibited over the years with his teenage female fans, it somewhat is considering her recent tack of ramping up a feminist position (a video of her singing along to Ariana Grande’s “God Is A Woman” being just one such example of late) in the era of her career called post-fetishizing abusive relationships.
Plus, the sayings, “you are the company you keep” and “guilty by association” ring especially true in the cases of female artists who have cozied up to the worst possible men in their industry (just ask Rose McGowan her stance again on Meryl and Harvey). Of course, it’s also somewhat embarrassing when considering that women are “supposed to be” innately intuitive enough to sense when there is something “off” about another human being (typically one packing a penis). But Del Rey, musically inclined spirit that she is, could not see past the sheer “artistry” of BØRNS. Just as Tina Turner with Ike or Whitney with Bobby (though both men made far shittier music than the women that brought them more headlines than they ever could themselves).
Alas, BØRNS has only further incriminated himself in making a “lady doth protest too much” statement that denies any wrongdoing: “I am both hurt and angered over the disturbing and false allegations that have been spread over the past few days on social media. All of the relationships I have had were legal and consensual. They ended abruptly and that obviously caused hurt feelings, but for anyone to suggest anything beyond that is irresponsible.”
Let it be known that Lyss, one of the frontrunners who described her pattern-oriented experience with the singer, specifically stated, “I just wanted to clarify that I did not accuse him of rape, the sex was consensual, and happened when I was of age.” This distinction is important for the men who like to constantly say in response to women’s “claims” that they are crying wolf. Nonetheless, the disgusting level of master manipulation at play cannot be ignored as Lyss recounted, “He got me drunk, started touching me, and we went into his bedroom. The things he did were things I did not want, and it hurt. He was aggressive and controlling and I was so fucking scared of him.”
Another girl, nineteen-year-old Mathilda, added of his mind controlling, cult leader propensities (LDR’s narrative bread and butter on tracks like “Ultraviolence”), “If I didn’t send any [nudes], he ghosted me for days.” Upon flying her out to Hamburg when she was “well-behaved” enough, Mathilda then found, “I did not like the way he wanted to have sex with me. Made me scream for daddy’s cock…very uncomfortable. [But] I got very attached and he knew that. I was just a little puppet in his game.” A game that also included the singer offering to follow her on Instagram if she sent him “a very gross video.” In her moldable mind, “If he did follow me, it would be a proof to me that I actually meant something to him.” Obeying his request, she made and sent the video, only for BØRNS to unfollow her after following for a brief moment in exchange.
From the age of sixteen, Lyss was in social media contact with BØRNS, “groomed,” as she put it, to have sex with him at eighteen. Donald Trump would likely chastise, “Well what did you think was going to happen? You meet a man for drinks, expectations mount” (though even that is too eloquent of a comment for him). This, “naturally,” plays into the dangerous combination of white male privilege and alcohol that serves as the inevitable recipe for sexual assault.
Lyss, noted, “He told me what he wanted to do to me, and wanted me to call him ‘daddy.’ And referred to himself as such. He asked me questions that made me uncomfortable that fed into his fetishes. He would ask me to send specific pictures and videos of myself, and I did. I was so terrified of losing him because he became a normalcy in my life.” Oof, no wonder Lana gravitated toward him considering that famous lyric, “You can be my full-time daddy.” The predatory nature of BØRNS toward his fans augments in skeeviness when acknowledging the advantage he took over their impressionable, barely post-Lolita age bracket. Something Del Rey likely experienced herself in those “lost years” of being a runaway. So surely the sting of realizing someone she once supported with such ardor could perform this level of distinct fuckery toward women has got to be potent.
Now her vocals must be linked forever to a person who Svengali’d the shit out of his fans–the type of teen girls that would idolize Lana’s glamorization–once upon a time–of fucked up love too. Thing is, after a certain age, you just want to be someone’s equal in a relationship, as opposed to playing all these psychologically damaging mind games. At least, as a woman. It’s unclear if men are ever capable of growing out of this “stage” (which sometimes takes palpable form when you are a musician).
