In the (Christmas) spirit of seasonal specials that have come before, Sabrina Carpenter jumps right into the overlying message of X(xx)mas: materialism. Because, yes, she rightfully chooses to open A Nonsense Christmas with “Buy Me Presents,” the second track on her holiday EP, Fruitcake (released in 2023). In fact, the airing of this special more than slightly contributed to the spike in sales of the vinyl version of Fruitcake, with Billboard reporting 31,000 physical records sold this month. That’s quite a lot for a “Gen Z icon.” Even though, lest anyone forget, half of people who buy records in the U.S. don’t even own a record player. In other words, it don’t make no never mind to Gen Z about whether or not they can actually listen to the tangible item they’ve just bought—all they want it for is the “aesthetic.” Hence, the materialistic “gene” carrying over into their generation vis-à-vis buying a fuck ton of physical items despite being the first batch of humans to grow up in an entirely digital way.
So it is that a song like “Buy Me Presents”—complete with its sugar daddy “undertones”—resonates with Carpenter’s primary fanbase. To remind listeners of that resonance, Carpenter stands atop a layered stage resembling a cake (a nod to Busby Berkeley-style sets) as she wears a floor-length pink gown (paired with black elbow-length gloves) à la Marilyn Monroe meets Jessica Rabbit. Indeed, it’s not totally unlike the look that Dua Lipa sported for An Evening With Dua Lipa.
Singing about her usual subject—a no-good cad—Carpenter warns her would-be lover, “If you don’t wanna buy me presents/Drink me like a warm glass of milk/If you’re not gonna race here from the North Pole to Beverly Hills/Just to keep my stocking filled/Well I know somebody who will.” That “somebody who will” is, of course, Santa Claus. And there’s plenty of fetishism about the “old man” in A Nonsense Christmas. Hence, the need for Sean Astin to play him in one of the first sketches featuring Owen Thiele and Megan Stalter.
After already setting the stage for her “Daddy-but-make-it-Santa” fetish with her lyrics, “He’s a little bit older/Like super old/Got a bit of a dad bod/From a city that’s colder (brrr)/But damn it, he’s hot,” Carpenter introduces her new boyfriend, “Nick,” to her friends. Friends who are quick to point out that he’s Santa. Carpenter vehemently denies such a “body-shaming” accusation, using the logic that if he’s Santa, then how is he so good in bed? Stalter asks where it’s supposed to say that Santa is known for being “bad in bed,” to which Carpenter, playing her “character” in this SNL-esque sketch, replies, “If you read the original Turkish folklore text, Santa doesn’t last.”
In the end, however, Carpenter admits that it must be him because he’s able to give her the gift of a duet with Shania Twain (initially showing up as “Mrs. Claus,” the one who wanted her and Santa to have an open relationship in the first place). And naturally, the unlikely pair (apart from Carpenter singing her “karaoke” version of “That Don’t Impress Me Much” during the Short n’ Sweet Tour in Toronto) opts to sing “Santa Baby,” all decked out in their Bob Mackie-esque attire (though Twain’s dress is by Genny and Carpenter’s is from Annie’s Ibiza). Based on their “Christmas chemistry,” it’s easy to see that Twain wasn’t lying when she said, “When I tell you I had the most fun shooting A Nonsense Christmas with Sabrina I’m not exaggerating, she is so funny, I basically spent the entire shoot laughing!” That much also comes across during the bloopers shown throughout the credits (where Carpenter gets her moment to please [please please] the gays even more with a Hilary Duff PSA allusion). In Twain’s blooper, she’s revealed to initially botch the lyrics to “Santa Baby” by urging St. Nick to “slip a stable” (instead of a sable) “under the tree.”
After her Shania collab, Carpenter then veers back into Saturday Night Live territory with another sketch that provides her with her “Lonely Island moment.” And, as though to play up her homage to said variety show, Kyle Mooney joins in as the butt of the joke: a song called “What Do I Get My Brother-in-Law?” Speaking to the struggle that many a girl goes through when dealing with her sister’s husband, Carpenter proceeds to sing about realizing how she has no idea who this man really is or what his interests are. Such is the nature of some suburban siblings’ “wallpaper/accessory” husbands.
Carpenter continues to mete out the celebrity guests with Kali Uchis, who joins her for a sultry, even-more-suggestive-than usual rendition of “I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus.” With the two situated by a fireplace, it’s one of the most “no frills” moments that director Sam Wrench has to contend with in the special. And yes, Wrench is no stranger to this particular genre, having directed Christmas at Graceland last year (along with the professional coup of getting The Eras Tour for his resume). But more than Wrench, it is set designer Jason Sherwood who makes the special feel, well, special. More to the point, nostalgic (a quality that the masses find increasingly irresistible in these shitty times). With his suburban home-inspired sets and the importance placed on accommodating and incorporating a live studio audience, it’s apparent that Sherwood and everyone involved in the special wasn’t just doing it for the paycheck (though that certainly didn’t hurt anyone’s motivation), but because there is a clear respect for this specific seasonal genre.
In fact, it’s a genre that’s been so “played” at this point that Carpenter quips during her parody of “It’s the Most Wonderful Time of the Year,” “There are comedy specials, and there are music specials and there are holiday specials… But who does musical comedy holiday specials? A lot of people. But do those specials have celebrity guests? Yes they do! Everyone with a musical comedy holiday special does them with celebrity guests and…this is one of those.” And, as such, Carpenter feels obliged to save one of the biggest celebrity “gets” of the year—Chappell Roan—for the “third act” of her special. A musical combination that definitely isn’t nonsense as each pop star makes up two parts of what is being called the “holy trinity” of 2024 (Charli XCX is obviously the third pop girl in said trinity).
Thus, Carpenter and Roan joining together for a duet of Wham!’s “Last Christmas” is a powerful thing (and yes, Roan jokes, “I look so straight in this outfit” during the blooper section). One that is accentuated by Sherwood’s decision to create a set that mimics a deflated and melancholic “when the party’s over” look—complete with crushed red Solo cups and empty bottles strewn everywhere as the pair riffs on doing at-home karaoke from the lyrics scrolling by on the screen of an “old-timey” TV.
As if that weren’t enough, Carpenter then rounds out the special with an emotional performance of “Cindy Lou Who”—which is easily bound to be a modern Christmas classic the way that Mariah Carey’s “All I Want for Christmas” eventually became. In fact, there’s a reason Carpenter references Carey in the first teaser trailer for A Nonsense Christmas, asking the audience after the camera pans up from her stiletto Santa boots, “Expecting someone else?”
Not anymore. Because, for the first time, Carpenter seems to be leading the concept of a “Christmas special” (and Christmas music) somewhat into “the future” (or what’s left of it for those even able to celebrate Christmas in the “traditional” materialistic and decadent way). Which means it’s Mariah who “better watch out.”
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