Though Milan Fashion Week commenced on September 17th, it was Jennifer Lopez’s surprise closing of the Versace show in an updated version of her iconic green jungle-inspired print dress that, four days in (on September 20th), finally got people really talking about it. Surely, you remember the dress. The one with the plunging neckline (understatement) that was so viral before people were truly familiar with the term that it forced Google to create Google Images. Because co-founders Larry Page and Sergey Brin needed to accommodate the intense demand of pervs and jealous bitches wanting to see the dress that launched Lopez into a new level of fame, as well as one of the early 00s beacons of curvaceous body worship that preceded Kim Kardashian.
With Versace returning to the past (as all fashion designers must to prove the Miranda Priestly vexation, “Florals? For spring? Groundbreaking.”) by revisiting the jungle theme, it was only natural that Lopez should be called upon to mark the Spring 2020 collection’s debut in the dress that has come mean so much to fashion and pop culture since she debuted it at the 2000 Grammys, with her then boyfriend who was then called Puff Daddy. But of course he took an immediate backseat as her arm candy with the daringness of the frock (for the era).
That people’s threshold for what shocks them has grown considerably larger since 2000, the green dress of 2019 gives more opportunity for skin exposure, with dramatic cutouts at the sides and a greater chance for the flowingness of the bottom half of the dress to expose jeweled underwear (Carrie Bradshaw would grudgingly approve)–which J. Lo was all too happy to showcase as she lifted the sides of her palm print dress like wings that might take her to the version of heaven the Arabs are always talking about (like a virgin, being the operative term).
With the entire crowd agog by the surprise, the fashion world was, for once, not left stone-faced by watching a show (anything but, in fact, as memes elucidating the wig-snatching nature of the event were cropping up within minutes of J. Lo’s grand entrance). For how could anyone deny that J. Lo and her dress are, apart from a fine wine, about the only things that have improved with time? While most are still scratching their heads over her age-defying (particularly with regard to her physique) capabilities–because even though every celebrity has money for upkeep, none of them in her age bracket look like they can pass for being in their thirties–they’re now wondering how they could have gone so long without seeing this dress revitalized again. And in an even more coordinated manner than before as J. Lo, this time around, sported stilettos with leaf-adorned straps that played up the jungle motif (in contrast to the silver jeweled ones she chose to pair with the dress in 2000).
If one doesn’t believe in the J. Lo frenzy caused by realizing she’s one of the only entities that time smiles upon rather than wilts, just consider how lukewarm the reaction would be to Gwyneth Paltrow walking down the Milan Fashion Week runway in that pink taffeta gown that also caused emulation and awe on the red carpet at the March 1999 Academy Awards. Of course, that would never happen because Ralph Lauren is too vanilla for Italians.
