Even though October is certainly the time to exhibit frights and horrors, perhaps nobody could have anticipated what Kim Kardashian had in store for Halloween. No stranger to the crass methods it takes to become a billionaire, the “star” has reached arguably a new low this year (apart from American Horror Story: Delicate) by promoting a particular product ahead of its release on October 31st. And while being a corporate slut is one of the “titles” she most proudly adheres to being, her latest shenanigan for promoting Skims takes the (probably gluten-free) cake with regard to grotesque and needless prostitution.
The “ad” (or rather, filmed project designed to be posted on Instagram) in question begins at a computer in a beige office setting that throws it back to the days of corporate glory. Sitting in front of the desk is none other than a beigely dressed Kardashian, sporting, of course, her Skims nipple bra. But before our attention is drawn to that, Kim tonelessly lists off our current bleak reality: “The Earth’s temperature is getting hotter and hotter. The sea levels are rising. The ice sheets are shrinking [did she mean melting?].” She then looks right into the camera and says, “And I’m not a scientist.” Standing up from her chair, she then gets to the point of what this is really all about: selling a bra with built-in nipples. That’s right, Kim, like all unwavering capitalists, ultimately believes that the decimation of the environment and its resulting effects can still be commodifiable. And tragically, it can be—and is, as Kardashian shows us in real time with this absurd commercial. Its absurdity is part of her defense mechanism in still being able to “get away with doing it.” She can position it as “absurdist art.” Or “corporate surrealism.” That latter term being what Grimes used to describe it. You know, Grimes—that well-known supporter of billionaire and corporate overlords (mostly via having some spawns with Elon Musk). She was quick to repost Kardashian’s video with the caption, “This is god tier performance art. Corporate surrealism at its finest.”
The only thing is: it’s not surreal at all. It’s only too real. More accurately, it’s capitalist realism. This idea that corporations don’t want their customers (walking dollar signs, as far as they’re concerned) to bother with trying to make a change that could prevent the irrevocable damage to Mother Nature that will eventually signal the endangerment of humankind. They want people, instead, to “adapt” and “get used to” the situation. The best way to do that is to poke fun at it. Be “light-hearted” about it. Because what could possibly make one’s heart lighter than the thought of a raging wildfire or hurricane or tornado coming for them?
Mark Fisher highlighted this tactic for keeping big business booming years ago. Indeed, being “anti-capitalist” has been in fashion since the 90s, with the surge of Gen X angst reflected in the styles of grunge and alternative music. Which was swiftly co-opted by companies like the Gap and Starbucks for increased profit. So sure, anyone “with principles” can talk shit about capitalism and its damaging effects as a means to feel better about themselves. Like they’re not actually part of or contributing to the problem. Capitalist propaganda helps ensure that talking about is “enough.” For, as Fisher noted, “…anti-capitalism is widely disseminated in capitalism. Time after time, the villain in Hollywood films will turn out to be the ‘evil corporation.’ Far from undermining capitalist realism, this gestural anti-capitalism actually reinforces it.” Emphasis on gestural. Because no one is actually going to do something that would infer anything beyond the “symbolic.” That would mean losing profit. And the only thing a capitalist hates more than a socialist is losing profit.
Kardashian exemplifies this “self-awareness” method in her ad. As though to say, “I know the Earth is crumbling, but you should still buy my product because we’re all doomed anyway.” Walking away from the desk, Kim continues (clearly thinking she’s the cleverest and funniest girl in the world), “I do believe everyone can use their skillset to do their part.” She then approaches a projection screen with a presentation pointer to declare, “That’s why I’m introducing a brand-new bra with a built-in nipple.”
Naturally, a diagram-esque image of said bra is displayed on the screen. But Kim knows that nobody is really focusing on that, so much as the product itself that she’s already modeling. As though she’s just come up with the solution for climate change (which everyone already knows: stop using fucking fossil fuels), Kim then chirps, “So no matter how hot it is, you’ll always look cold.” She returns to the desk to lean back against it “sensually,” concluding, “Some days are hard, but…these nipples are harder. And unlike the icebergs, these aren’t going anywhere.”
Being that Kim is no stranger to tone deafness (see: originally wanting to call Skims “Kimono,” North’s Friesian horses, her version of feeling “normal” during the pandemic, etc.), it wouldn’t be surprising if she genuinely had “no awareness” of the multi-layered effrontery provided by this little “PSA.” Not least of which is further normalizing the notion that people must simply learn to live with and “work around” the environment being fucked as a result of product shillers like her. And yeah, it’s very easy to be “blithe” about the whole thing in your advertising campaign when you know you have the privilege of money to insulate (no temperature pun intended) you from the inevitable fallout of climate change. But sooner or later, even the rich might find that money can’t buy them out of their environmental comeuppance.
Oh and, by the way, Samantha Jones (Kim Cattrall) from Sex and the City was already pushing the “built-in” nipple trend in 2001, telling her trio of friends in “Baby, Talk Is Cheap,” “Nipples are huge right now. Open any magazine—it’s not that cold. They’re either tweaking or they’re wearing these.” She then holds up two small rubber nipples that she says someone sent her as a “promotional thing.” Clearly, not Kim Kardashian, who was still relegated to obscurity at the time, having just finished a stint working at an Encino clothing store called Body. But maybe she caught that SATC episode in 2001, and was “subliminally” inspired. One thing about the SATC nipples though: they take a lot less materials and packaging to manufacture and sell. But, obviously, Kardashian assuages any such concern for that/insists you can pat yourself on the back for being a consumer by including in her caption, “Skims is proud to donate ten percent of sales from our Skims Ultimate Nipple Bra, as a one-time donation [ha! one time] to @1percentftp—a global network with thousands of businesses and environmental organizations working together to support people and the planet.” To use a Valley girl phrase from someone who might shop at an Encino clothing store, “I’m so sure.”
