Mondo Bullshittio #50: Madonna Not Winning Most Iconic Performance at the 2024 VMAs

In a series called Mondo Bullshittio, let’s talk about some of the most glaring hypocrisies and faux pas in pop culture…and all that it affects.

In yet another one of many (seemingly infinite) examples in this world of how everything is rigged, the winner of MTV’s so-called “Most Iconic Performance” award—freshly added into the mix this year—was bequeathed to the least deserving nominee: Katy Perry’s “Roar” performance back in 2013. One that, by the way, absolutely no one remembers (and if they say they do, they’re definitely lying). However, considering that Perry was the 2024 recipient of MTV’s “coveted” Video Vanguard Award (decreasingly referred to by its full name: the Michael Jackson Video Vanguard Award), it seems more than a little bit “political” that she should be the one to claim the award for “Most Iconic Performance” when, in fact, what she offered back in 2013 was one of the least iconic performances in VMA history (which also extends to someone like Bryan Adams singing “Do I Have To Say The Words?” in 1992).

Indeed, of the seven nominees, the performances that people are likely to most immediately recall (even if solely by an image alone) include Madonna’s “Like A Virgin” at the 1984 VMAs, Eminem’s “The Real Slim Shady/The Way I Am” at the 2000 VMAs, Britney Spears, Christina Aguilera, Madonna and Missy Elliott’s “Like A Virgin/Hollywood” at the 2003 VMAs and Beyoncé’s “Love On Top” at the 2011 VMAs. The three other options—Perry doing “Roar,” Lady Gaga doing “Paparazzi” at the 2009 VMAs and Taylor Swift doing “You Belong With Me” at the 2009 VMAs—are hardly memorable at all.

But one supposes that, of the three least memorable out of those seven, Lady Gaga’s 2009 performance of “Paparazzi” was more “iconic” than “You Belong With Me” or “Roar” for how horrible her vocals were (not to mention how retroactively offensive her “disabled” shtick was) and the fact that “the fame” killed her at the end—with the fake blood pouring down her body to prove it as she was suspended in midair for the big finish. With regard to Swift, the only thing that people will ever remember about her appearance at the ’09 VMAs is her illustrious encounter with Kanye West, who incited their now lifelong bad blood by bum-rushing the stage when Swift won the award for Best Female Video, declaring that it was, instead, Beyoncé who had “one of the best videos of all time” (which is definitely not true of “Single Ladies [Put A Ring On It]”).  

And, if one is really going to try to make the claim that the “Roar” performance is “iconic,” let it be noted that Perry’s boxer costume and the boxing ring backdrop that was set up in front of the Brooklyn Bridge look like a bad knockoff of Madonna’s boxer persona from the Hard Candy era, which she also took on the road for the 2008-2009 Sticky & Sweet Tour. It was on that tour that Madonna incorporated her boxing aesthetic in a major way for the “Die Another Day” video interlude. And yes, it was in a manner far more, let us say, “hardcore” than what Perry offered “live from Empire-Fulton Ferry Park.”

In any event, the fact that Madonna had two nominations in the Most Iconic Performance category also might have led one to believe the odds were easily stacked in her favor, with both the 1984 and 2003 performances being the pinnacle of iconic. But no, clearly not. Because apparently people think that Perry bopping around in a shitty boxing costume and singing a Black Mirror-level type of “inspirational” song is much worthier of icon status than Madonna changing the fucking game on sexual and ironic performances with “Like A Virgin” or being the first (theoretically) hetero woman in the mainstream to make lesbianism chic (thus, normalized) in the twenty-first century (just as she also did in the twentieth with her Sandra Bernhard friendship/Erotica era [among other things]).

The question of who ought to have won this award should have been utterly undeniable. A proverbial no-brainer. Thus, to give the “honor” to Perry just proves that not only is everything political, but also that the masses (or maybe just the MTV VMAs in this instance) prefer to reward inferior trash. Because, objectively, there is absolutely no argument in favor of Perry dominating in this category. We’re talking about Madonna in one of the most signature fucking looks not just of her career, but in modern pop culture as we know it. A moment so iconic that it was riffed on again in 2003 for yet another performance that would turn out to be equally iconic in its own way (even in terms of cutting away from the Christina Aguilera beso for the sake of getting Justin Timberlake’s peeved reaction). And this time with Madonna making the then-latest generation of pop princesses into her brides, while she played the big dick energy groom.

Incidentally, it was less than a year later that Madonna and Perry would pose together for a V Magazine photoshoot (taken by none other than Madonna’s favorite photographer, Steven Klein). Although it was technically meant to “star” both of them, Madonna also stood out as the supreme force among the Bettie Page-inspired images of the duo in various S&M-y poses. But at least being styled and photographed by the same people put them on a more level playing field—because when it comes to VMAs performances, there’s no fucking contest. Regardless of the grave error made at the 2024 VMAs deeming Perry the “winner.”