In a series called Mondo Bullshittio, let’s talk about some of the most glaring hypocrisies and faux pas in pop culture…and all that it affects.
If one was under the misguided assumption that the collective population has been far too desensitized since the days when, for example, “Justify My Love” was causing enough of a stir to get banned from airplay on MTV, rest easy: being scandalized by Madonna’s sexuality is still alive and well. Or so the latest lawsuit stemming from The Celebration Tour would have one believe. While fans might have thought that the fresh complaint would stop at being related to her tardiness (a long-standing trait of Madonna’s when it comes to arriving onstage any “earlier” than ten p.m.), the most recent disgruntled concertgoer has upped the ante by centering his grievance on the pop singer’s penchant for exhibiting “pornography without warning.” If this causes a bit of a laugh (as it should), that’s likely because, if Madonna’s various reinventions throughout her career have all shared one thing in common, it’s this: sexually provocative content.
As a rebuttal, some might point out that now fabled period during the early years of her marriage to Guy Ritchie when Madonna was cosplaying a “staid” English country housewife, complete with serving as the cover star of Good Housekeeping and writing a series of children’s books (which were met with the narrow-minded response that the woman who wrote Sex shouldn’t be “permitted” to tell children’s stories). But even during that period, her always radiating sexuality was present in videos like 2003’s “Hollywood” (which itself was a nod to the Erotica era at the end when she’s hitchhiking), 2003’s art installation collab with Steven Klein, X-STaTIC PRO=CeSS, locking lips with Britney and Christina at the 2003 VMAs, 2005’s “Hung Up,” featuring a moment (in both video and live performance form) where Madonna writhes in orgiastic ecstasy with her then current cabal of dancers, and pretty much any of the visuals (picture or video) for her 2008 Hard Candy album. Not so coincidentally, 2008 would mark the year of her divorce from Ritchie.
All of which is to say that Madonna has never really tried to suppress her sexuality for the sake of catering to other people’s comfort levels. Even when she “put her clothes back on” for the Bedtime Stories/Something to Remember era, it wasn’t as though her lingerie didn’t still peer out (very much so in the “Take A Bow” video, for instance). What’s more, M’s predilection for skin-baring has only seemed to amplify in the years when our patriarchal society would expect/“demand” that she “cover up” (the MDNA Tour comes to mind). The Celebration Tour proved no exception to the rule, with an entire segment of the show featuring Madonna clad in nothing but a red silk slip with black lace embellishments.
This ensemble, appropriately, was worn during the Act II portion of the show that most likely caused “offense” to the plaintiff (whose name is quite public but will not be mentioned here). During this part of the concert, Madonna sings her most notoriously sexy songs, including “Erotica,” “Justify My Love,” “Fever,” “Hung Up” a.k.a. “Hung Up on Tokischa” (a select performance of which allowed Tokischa the chance to join Madonna onstage at Madison Square Garden to engage in one of their numerous public besos since meeting one another) and “Bad Girl.”
Many of the headlines about the lawsuit are sure to include not only the phrase “sued by fan” (a label that doesn’t really befit someone who claimed to be surprised by Madonna’s sexual “escapades” onstage), but also “sued by a male fan.” In fact, the lawsuit against Madonna for her tardiness at Barclays was also brought against her by two male fans. And, you know, not to stereotype, but one can presume said fans are gay. Which makes this look like, well, the worst kind of cunty queen behavior. Not to mention rooted in a particular kind of gay male misogyny. After all, the fan in question was seemingly most affronted by being “forced to watch topless women on stage simulating sex acts.”
First of all, “forced”? Please. Secondly, it’s interesting that “topless” (a.k.a. wearing flesh-colored clothing) women should be called out by a man. Not usually a problem for most straight men—which is what leads one to believe the plaintiff is gay or gay-adjacent. What’s more, Madonna actually did have a topless dancer open her concert (and appear topless repeatedly thereafter) during 1993’s The Girlie Show. A tour that, even more than Blond Ambition, touted Madonna’s “pornographic” brand. And, speaking of Blond Ambition, one ought to bear in mind that Madonna actually did “simulate sex acts” by way of her illustrious masturbation sequence at the end of “Like A Virgin.” A performance so controversial it almost got her arrested in “the fascist state of Toronto,” as immortalized in Truth or Dare.
A replica of the bed she performed that very act of self-love on was, appropriately (or inappropriately, to some), displayed in all its full glory at the opening of Act II, as Madonna performed the same arm-centric choreography fans would recognize from the “Papa Don’t Preach” of Blond Ambition. With this bed serving as the “harbinger” of what “sexual hijinks” were yet to, er, come, Madonna did technically give more than enough of a hint to anyone who might not be expecting “pornography.” And yes, maybe this plaintiff has never actually seen any real pornography in order to understand that The Celebration Tour was not that.
Then again, these are times fraught with “highly sensitive” (read: performatively fragile) people. In addition to extremely sue-happy ones, often seeking to make a fast buck from someone they view as having plenty to spare. Alas, one imagines that this plaintiff really didn’t think his accusation through. For Madonna’s lawyers have ample evidence to support her lifelong commitment to being a “pornographer.” Ergo, it being no surprise when she flaunts such “porno predilections” onstage.
