As is typical of the adage about biting the hand that feeds you, a lawsuit against Madonna for taking the stage too late for her Madame X Tour from a “fan” has been met with unanimous agreement on the part of the apparently gauche audiences in attendance at her San Francisco and Las Vegas shows (the latter “city” of which Madonna is notoriously not fond of playing–cue the line from I’m Going To Tell You a Secret about Japanese businessmen playing with their “Blackberries” for the duration of the show).
With Madonna typically not taking the stage until around 10:30 p.m. (despite previous tickets citing an 8:30 p.m. start time–which, as any seasoned concert goer knows, is a loose guideline to being with), her uppity audience has perhaps been feeling the pain of the late start time more palpably due to her no cellphones policy at the show. Meaning ticket holders are required to lock up their phones (via Yondr’s technology) while in the main stage area, only able to unseal them in designated points throughout the venue. Without being able to scroll listlessly ad nauseam as a means of distraction–nor take pictures of M when she mounts the stage so that they can have something to parade in exchange for all the money they spent–it’s no wonder plebeians are all atwitter (for, according to one “fan’s” account of a Vegas jaunt, she shaded people for being poor–maybe something to do with those who have 9 to 6-type jobs that require them to wake up early in the morning).
In response to the outrage, the final nail of which was wedged into the coffin of a 12:30 a.m. start time at a Caesar’s Palace date, she posted a clip from one of her audience ribbings on Instagram saying, “Here’s something you all need to understand… and that is: a queen is never late.” The unfinished sentiment being, “Everyone else is simply early.” Props for quoting The Princess Diaries. While Madonna isn’t wrong, the problem is, we exist in a time when leniency for artists “just because” they have broken ground time and time again doesn’t compute. Because reverence isn’t really a thing in the twenty-first century. Nor is the concept of not getting instant gratification. Madonna is in complete defiance of this on so many levels. What’s more, if Frank Sinatra or Elvis Presley had shown up drunkenly to the stage even later than (sober) Madonna back in their heyday, they, of course, would’ve been excused. They were great geniuses, artistic rabble-rousers. While, even to this day, Madonna is “a bitch” and “arrogant.” Not just for showing up late, but for sharing her political views instead of singing her hits–as though she should be propped up on the stage to chant “Like A Virgin” and “Material Girl” as mere punishment for being a female pop star over the age of thirty. The lynch mob mentality that abounds when it comes to M is nothing new. But this lawsuit element from a so-called fan is something entirely unprecedented. For anyone buying tickets to the Madame X Tour in the first place must surely be aware that this is not going to be a conventional production. Nor is it going to pander in any, way, shape or form–least of all in terms of the setlist.
The class action–yes, class action–lawsuit being helmed by Floridian (quelle surprise) Nate Hollander stems from his insistence that her late start times have hindered his ability to resell the tickets at face value. First of all, if you’re trying to sell proverbial golden tickets (something Veruca, not Charlie would do) in the first place, maybe this is your karma. Second of all, trying to resell tickets to milquetoasts in Florida with staunch bedtimes (even if it is the once great party hub of Miami) is never going to work. Madonna is not responsible for your inability to make use of the nefarious gig economy. And yeah, maybe she should shade you for being a little bitch. For one thing, if you’re the kind of person able to afford a Madame X ticket in the first place, it should be highly likely that missing or being late to one day of work isn’t going to that drastically affect your bank account. And if it does, don’t fucking spring for one in the first place. Anyone going to the show should, by now, be well-aware that it’s Madonna’s journey you’re about to embark upon, and you’re just along for the ride. No matter how late into the wee hours of the morning that takes you.
Further, knowing Madonna’s brand of extreme meticulousness, the reason for her late start time is likely 1) to ensure everything is perfect and 2) to tailor the vibe of the concert to the album–inspired by a city that has no issue with staying up late: Lisbon. One can only hope that when M finally brings her show to Europe, the clientele won’t be such a sue-happy little twat that cries like a baby when it isn’t put to bed at a “reasonable” hour. In fact, that only has to be the case–for Europeans have never been averse to staying up (and out) late. Again, one must ask Madonna, are you sure you want to move back to the U.S. for the sake of some nostalgic New York bullshit?
