It was said in Matthew 5:5, “Blessed are the meek: for they shall inherit the earth.” But, as usual, the bible was wrong, for it is your local NYC waiter who holds all the power to make or break your dining experience. That said, the most beautiful beacon of this fact to date is the gumption-filled waiter at Cafeteria (yes, the very “diner” that the women of Sex and the City spent years complaining about men in) who was rightly unable to resist cueing “thank u, next” upon Pete Davidson’s entry into the establishment, waiting for him to sit down with his alleged date (though this, one wants to believe, is hearsay) before pulling the proverbial trigger that, based on the video captured, he seemed not to feel the bullet emit from.
Davidson, predictably, and despite looking nonplussed about hearing the song in a public venue, was incited to post a whining “woe is me” missive following the so-called public shaming, writing–with period punctuation that is truly infuriating–a message on his iPhone Notes to share on social media with those he wants to appear as a martyr to. It went like this:
“I’ve kept my mouth shut. Never mentioned any names, never said a word about anyone or anything. I’ve been getting online bullied and in public by people for 9 months. I’ve spoken about BPD and being suicidal publicly only in the hopes that it will help bring awareness and help kids like myself who don’t want to be on this earth. I just want you guys to know. No matter how hard the internet or anyone tries to make me kill myself. I won’t. I’m upset I even have to say this. To all those holding me down and seeing this for what it is–I see you and I love you.”
Really? “What it is?” Kept his mouth shut? What about capitalizing on jokes regarding the breakup for his sole claim to fame as a marginal figure on SNL by “quipping” in a promo, “I’m Pete. Do you want to get married?” Or “playing” during a Weekend Update segment, “Last night I switched her birth control with Tic-Tacs…I believe in us and all, but I just want to make sure that she can’t go anywhere.”? So please, number one, do not try to play the muhfukkin’ innocente when one’s mouth has flagrantly not been kept shut, has definitely mentioned names and said a word (or two) about someone very particular. It’s a classic case of false martyrdom and quintessential male gaslighting to make the woman and her supporters somehow believe they’re being “too harsh” or “unjustly cruel” in simply saying it how it is. The man can’t handle a very brief period of criticism that would have disintegrated much more quickly if he could have kept his cool and persisted in “not talking about it,” as he claimed not to have in, what else, talking about it.
Again, this all bears repeating Ariana Grande’s since deleted accusation, “For someone who claims to hate relevancy u sure love clinging to it huh.” Had Davidson continued to ignore his so-called bullying, he wouldn’t have set off yet another media storm surrounding his oh so terrible life getting paid to do what he enjoys and apparently having a big enough dick to swing around in some other pop star’s penthouse.
And who do we have to thank for Davidson once more showing his lily-livered colors (even if those easily taken in would argue it took “courage” for him to “speak out”)? The proletariat at Cafeteria who would not let his “station in life” be silenced long enough to resist a tailor-made opportunity to remind rich people claiming to be homeless because they’ve been exiled from their even richer ex-girlfriend’s multimillion dollar condo that they best know them damn place when they walk into the public space.
